Its that time of the year... as my birthday draws nearer, christmas and new year too.. it makes me nostalgic and depending on what happens that day...I sometimes feel quite alone. I feel a little sorry for myself ...that it would be nice to have someone to share the load with or just to share my deepest desires or thoughts. I went to bed feeling that way last night, this morning I feel different. This is my "script" , this is the life I have chosen. I do have people around me who are more than willing to... not just carry my load but also carry me some of the way.. my sister and brother in law, my best friend and lucky charm... I have so many "angels" around me who just come when I need suppport and leave quietly when they see that I am ok. And, really.. there are so many of them.... even strangers on the street go out of their way to make my world a little better!
Its got to do with the "lens" I choose to put on and look out of. I can wear the " I am alone, nobody loves me lens" or I can choose to wear the " this is neat, look at the number of people who love me" lens.
Is it all just about positive thinking? I dont think so. Thinking is just one faculty...thinking without feeling doesnt cut it for me...its like lying to myself and pretending!. Feeling helps me connect with my emotion but feeling combined with a higher self/spirituality/God just takes me to a completely new level. It allows me to see things I have never seen - the colours, the layers, the sounds, the textures....its just amazing. It opens up a whole new world for me.
I think we complicate life too much. Its normal to have the "stone" days every now and then. It's what we do with the stone that matters. Reminds me of something I read a long time ago by Sri Sri Ravi Shankar "If you are holding on to stones in your hands, your hands will not be free to take the diamonds and gold."
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