Living in a Cave...

My dad used to say that its easier to be a sage or wise person if you lived in a cave/ up in the mountains far away from everyday life. He said the real challenge is in being able to rise above and make wise and noble choices when you are serving your "human" responsibilities as a parent, employee or boss , as a son or daughter ...as an everyday person living life. And whenever I felt that I was judging myself, this is what I would recall. Sometimes, its hard to be a "good " person and think "peaceful" thoughts. Especially when we feel slighted or hurt by someone else. We dont wish them evil but we feel bad about having negative thoughts about someone. Children on the other hand allow themselves to feel an emotion fully. I know kids ( I wont say whose kids!!) who say things like " I hate my teacher...she is such a B....." and when I ask why and what they want to do about it .... this one kid i know would smile cheekily and say " I have already put her in the freezer or put her in a spaceship and sent her into outer space" These are the two more mild examples of what they would do! But by doing what they do, they have found a way to cope with what they feel in the moment and they dont feel guilty about it.

Everytime we reject a thought and pretend its not there, we reject a part of ourselves because in truth this is what we are feeling. By accepting that we feel a certain way without judgement, we give ourselves permission to process that emotion. At a course I did recently, the instructor said that our emotions are "energy in motion". We take in energy in the form of food and we digest it and what we dont want, comes out. Breath is the same, we take it in , process it and expel carbon dioxide. I never looked at emotions in this way and I have been thinking about it alot. So we feed ourselves in many ways - food as fuel for the body, knowledge for the mind, breath maybe for the body but its also our connection to our spirit or God as when you breathe you take in life and it calms you down...and I guess emotion is the "food" for the heart!!! If this is the case, then we need to apply the same natural principles that apply to the other bodily functions. Just that with food and breath - it happens on auto pilot , the body takes over whereas with information/mind food and emotions, we have to actively process it and be aware. This is the challenge, I am a master as distracting myself... I could write a thesis about it! and these days, with awareness I recognise the distractions and give myself the time to clear out the "mental and emotional " garbage as it comes through and also at the end of the day. Its still a chore and everytime I recognise a "wave of emotion or thought, I sigh "...here we go again!" But when I deal with it, I am a happier person, this is because I am not constantly fighting myself or others in my "head space" or projecting my fears or past hurts or having "mental conversations with people I am not happy with"... I find myself really present in the moment . Its such a freedom. Do I do it consistently?... No! but I am getting better at it ...why?... because " I dont live it a cave." I have kids to feed, work to do, earn a living and these days take out the garbage regularly ( mental and emotional garbage too)! Well thats my excuse anyway... I am learning that its really about doing my best in every moment... thats all I have to do!