I am reading a book by Suzy Welch , 10-10-10, 10 months and 10 years. And I have been applying it to my life. I like the idea of looking at things that way... looking at the implication / effect of decisions i make at this point in time and how it will it affect me in the next 10 minutes, the next 10 months and in 10 years. I think to some extent, I do this naturally, sometimes , when I am reluctant to make a decision or make a hard call , I think about what my life would be like in the next 5-10 years if i made that decision. When i do this, i usually manage to scare myself enough to move from that position of indecision. Which brings me to the point about us humans - do we only shift or make changes to our life when we scare ourselves or do we propel ourselves into the future proactively?
A friend's view is that people don't make changes or change unless they really have to... when he first said that to me, I disagreed with him because I had the belief that most people want to change and embrace change. But I was young then and probably not happy with the life I led because at this point in my life I would have agreed with him. I like my life and I don't really want to change it much... does that mean I have become one of those people who resist change?... I am not sure.
When I really think about it, there are things about my life that I want to be the same... eg. where my hair brush is or how my clothes are hung in my closet or where the nail clipper or umbrella is ... this part of my life , my routines that i dont want to change... I want it to be predictable. Then there are other parts of my life where I would jump at any opportunity for a fresh perspective and movement/change. Someone said to me a long time ago " change is only change, its not good or bad, its just change" movement is an essential part of life because life is dyanmic and inevitable. Change is the one thing that is guaranteed in our lives especially in the area of relationships. I have seen relationships evolve over time, this is when the parties involved grow together and pace themselves. But the reality most often people change so much that we cant even recognise them anymore. Like a friend commented recently when she found out that her husband was having an affair " I dont know him anymore" In this case, change is a catalyst in her life to wake her up from her slumber, to ask her her to start living her life fully instead of living in her husband's shadow. In the moment - 10 minutes, it looks and feels bad , in 10 months, she will get over it and if she allows herself in 10 years she will live a totally different life from what she has now. I send prayers and strength for my friend to live through this time of change. I ask that the wind of change bring goodness, gentleness and wisdom into both their lives. A friend sent me this prayer when I was 18 and its always stuck in my mind, although I cant remember the exact words, it went something like this :
" God grant me Humility to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can and Wisdom to know the difference"
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