Playing with Puppies...

I am biased ...my kids are the best in the world. They are my best champions , they stand for the truth in everything and are not afraid to stand up for what they believe in. If I had half the amount of confidence that they have, when I was their age, I think I would have ruled the world.
Children learn from us, adults around them and yet I often wonder what I have to teach them. They know what they want in life, they know who they are and they have a strong sense of right and wrong... what else do they need to know?

I guess what I can do for them to ensure that their spirits don't get bruised along the way, that they continue to be themselves and that they are given enough encouragement to live true to themselves.

The things they need most from me are time, love, energy and integrity. And yet most often , I find ways (unconsciously most times) to be occupied and "busy". Their requests to do things with me are quite often " inconvenient" ...for eg. they might decide to swim when I don't want to wash my hair again or they may want to go walking when its raining ....maybe they want to help me cook ...meaning my kitchen is going to turn into a war zone.
I have been thinking about time with my children lately and there is a growing sense of urgency. I know that in a few years they will be occupied with their friends and have their own form of " busy -ness" ... I know that this is a one time journey and that time is rushing past us. I catch myself thinking these days that I have to find a way to spend more time with them - doing the things they want to do with me. It does mean that I have to think differently and instead of worrying about the next thing I have to cross off my list... I need to just stop and enjoy them while they are here.

Sounds simple but I think many of us make this mistake over and over again. There is a part of us that believes that we live forever and that we have time. " I will do this tomorrow" or "when I get this bit sorted, I will have more time to deal with this". Will we...really?

Sometimes, I wonder.... if I died today, would I have done enough to let my children know how much I love them. I don't think so. For eg. when I get caught in rough weather when travelling in a plane , my thoughts wonder to " I am not ready yet, my children are not ready yet, I need more time with them" And yet , the minute I land, these thoughts fly away and I am thinking about all the things I have to do....none of these have to do with making time enjoy my children.

I am writing about this because I need to see it. Time , Love, Energy and Integrity is what they want from me. From tomorrow, I am going be conscious of how I incorporate this into my day with my children. Time may mean cycling, swimming, playing monopoly ...Love - may be just asking how they are doing/feeling a few times a day and making sure I hug them at least 5-6 times a day. Energy -means being fit so that I can keep up with them physically - most days I am mentally exhausted but I need to find that energy to pick myself up to do things they like with them. And Integrity - this I think is key...its about me being congruent with with what I say and do so that I can model to them there is hope in this world...that not all adults are screwing the world to the ground.

Taking time to celebrate and play is also important, because at the end of the day, this is all we remember about our childhood - the fun bits.

Things I remember and smile about :

1. Walking into the living room and finding my sister and my two kids sitting at the dining table ...each wearing a moustache and pretending like if things are normal
2. Working at my desk at work with my back turned away from the door and having my daughter creep up behind me and give me a hug ( she does this quite often and I love it)
3.Lying on the lap of one of my children and watching TV while they stroke my hair
4. Drawing on my children with a marker pen while they are asleep- having them wake up with moustaches, and lots of pictures drawn on their arms, legs and bodies
5. Stomping on puddles and dancing in the rain with my kids, having a water fight
6. Eating mangoes by the pool, with juice dripping down our arms and jumping in the pool straight after
7. Giggling and trying to hold back our laughter when we spot something funny but its too rude to laugh out loud, especially in the elevator
8. Holding hands with one or both of my champions and walking to the nearby restaurants for a meal
9. Planting candles in flower pots, watermelon and anything that would take candles and singing happy birthday for no reason - my daughter loved blowing out candles - why wait for a birthday!

I was at a restaurant tonight, having dinner with my children and my sister. At the table near us was a big family, with little kids and adults. At one point , I saw a little girl marching to the dinner table and her dad who was walking behind her, laughed when he spotted her marching and then he started marching behind her. He then said to her that she marched " beautifully" ...that made me smile. Children are our future and they need as much encouragement as possible. They learn from us , how to treat their children and how to treat us as we get older. Children of the world give us hope and the reason to live and when we look at it from this perspective, I guess there is nothing more important than helping our children grow strong , happy and safe. They don't always get that from school, they get that from us, the adults around them. I think the best part to all this is that if we relax a little and find joy here and now, we as adults gain the most...we get to re-live childhood again!