Friday, September 3, 2010
We learn lots of things in life but I think the most important lesson of all has to do with "learning to be ourselves". its probably the hardest lesson too. It's odd that most of us are not comfortable in our own skin... to varying degrees...at different times and situations. We get told, " be yourself" and yet many people are afraid that if they showed themselves that others wont like them. I see this in teenagers, in adults...in myself at different times.
I remember attending a talk by Wayne Dyer many years ago and he was talking about awareness, and about the games we play in life and he made one statement that stayed with me ... that sometimes he was embarrassed to be with himself! The difference is that he said it out loud and many people bury that thought deep inside themselves.
Yesterday, I was watching Chris Rock on Oprah and he said "secrets rot the soul" ...we often think we have secrets or thoughts that others dont know but the truth is that most people get a sense of where someone is at and most people actually cant be bothered about someone else' thoughts and discomfort because they are too busy worrying about their own!
We waste so much energy holding to things , past hurts, secrets, and in trying to hide ourselves from the world and believe me...it takes up sooo much energy!!! I know I have been there many times.
My most glaring lesson when I was 25 and was being interviewed by the media ( one of my first few) and the reporter asked me about my education... what kind of education I had...whether I had a degree or experience in business. Until that point, I tried to avoid these types of questions because I didnt have a degree at that time and naturally I didnt have that much business experience. But that day, I decided that I had enough of "pretending" and I said " no, I dont have a degree and no , I dont have business experience". Funnily that got me more publicity in the media than anything else I had done in the past. Looking back, I think I know why...I was authentic and stayed with me. I was willing to show myself as I was at that time.
At different times of my life I have been more myself than other times. I dont think its an age thing because I see more young people who are happy to be themselves which is quite refreshing. Maybe we learnt this when we are young and told to be at our best behaviour in front of visitors...and as children we understood it to mean that we were not good enough to be ourselves. Maybe its because we are not comfortable with ourselves and our own company..... I dont know... all i know is that I have felt such peace and calm within me at those times in my life when i was in alignment with who I was and the more I have those types of experiences, the more I know that this is where my bliss lies and... this is where I am most comfortable...in my own skin... being me. Its freed me up to live life fully....to do what i really came here to do at last!